


night skies and us

by teenageidiot



Category: Thai Actor RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Psychopaths, Boys In Love, Guns, Gunshot Wounds, M/M, Psychopaths In Love, Shooting Guns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-03
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:27:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26791381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teenageidiot/pseuds/teenageidiot
Summary: “It’s just,” Tay paused, then stared him straight in the eye, “Are you willing to do that whole run with me?”Right there, with the smallest and simplest choice of words, he has already lain out his whole heart and his insecurities. He told Jumpol, in that small motel room with the lights from the night sky shining on them, that he wants him. He may not say it in it’s full context, but it’s there and he hopes Jumpol feels it. He hopes he would feel how sincere he is and that, and he can’t stress this enough, he stays with him until the finish line.
Relationships: Off Jumpol Adulkittiporn/Tay Tawan Vihokratana
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	night skies and us

**Author's Note:**

> for lojain and everyone who wanted offtay psycho bfs

“Please, let me go.” 

A man on his knees begs, as two other men stand in front of him. One holds a bored, unamused expression while the other holds a sinister smile, as if he’s waiting for something that is bound to happen soon. 

“Oh no,” he says, still holding the same smile as he bends towards the man kneeling, “Weren’t you just saying you’d topple us to the ground, right?” he tilts his head, feigning sadness and pity on his face, “At the bar, you called us fairies, and said you won’t hesitate to beat us up.” 

The other one scoffs then he stretches his neck, “Jumpol, drop the act.” His voice was cold, and deadly like he doesn’t have any emotions left in him, “And get off his face, I want to see his reaction when the bullet finally pierces his skull.” He lets out a small chuckle when the man cowers in fear, away from the gun that has been set in his direction.

The gun is shiny, that’s something he can say, the light from the moon reflecting on its edges. 

“I’m sorry,” the man says, begging once again, “I was drunk,” he doesn’t even get to finish when the gun makes a booming sound around the deserted area. The words dying on the man’s throat.

One bullet. Right into the heart. 

Jumpol gasps and looks back on the man who still has the gun in his hands, the smoke nuzzling out from the last shot, “Tay!” He gleefully says, “You did it again!” He moves towards him, smiling, “You killed a man for me!” 

This time, rather than a low chuckle, Tay lets out a small laugh, “You know I would,” he looks at the man who’s gasping for breath, “He also deserves that, should’ve thought twice before challenging me.” He kicks the man’s leg to prove his point. 

Jumpol laughs, brings an arm over Tay’s shoulder, “What do you say we go now? I bet the police would have a field day knowing Tawan, their most wanted criminal, went on a killing spree again.” He earns a small punch on the shoulder by the other man.

“Says Off, who the police are also after because he helped the wanted criminal to escape,” Tay says as they walk back to the parking lot to get their car—that they stole on their way here. Another reason why the police are so hellbent on finding them. However, they've been on the run for years, they would get tired from chasing them, or they hope so.

Tay opens the passenger door for Jumpol, like the gentleman he is, and goes to his own side. Buckling his seatbelt, he notices that Jumpol is still shaking and in the years he knows this man, it’s a side effect of his adrenaline pulsing high everytime he gets a reward. With a small smile, he puts a hand over Jumpol’s hand to ground him. The other boy looks at him, his eyes wild, but Tay sees the softness in them. He sees how he’s grateful for him, and the love blossoms in his chest because he’s just as grateful for him.

“If the time comes, would you take me out of my misery?” Tay asks, softly, brushing his thumb on Jumpol’s hand and a small smile on his face as he finally drives away.

“I would.” Jumpol replies, just as soft and easy. “Would you do it for me, too?” 

“You know, I would.”

\---

Ever since, Tawan doesn’t feel any remorse or guilt. 

He realizes this when he accidentally pushes his classmate, even causing a large gash on the knee, in his first grade and he just didn’t feel.. anything. Oddly, he even felt satisfied somehow. 

He hated that boy.

It’s when he was in the guidance office standing with his parents and the boy he pushed, with his parents as well, is when he knows that his mind is different. His guidance counselor stared him down, asking him if he even felt guilty for doing what he did. Tawan just stands there, devoid of emotions on his face and eyes, and tells her, “No, I don’t.” 

His mom cries at home after that, asking his dad where she went wrong on raising him. She sobs on his dad’s chest asking if she was a bad parent, if she was a bad mom. He watches from the doorway on his room, still feeling nothing and it angers him then. Why isn’t he feeling anything? He should feel guilt for making his mom feel like that but he doesn’t. 

He cries then, not because of pain, but because he’s angry. Angry for being so emotionless, angry because he’s different, angry because he hates himself for being like this. 

Tawan grows up trying to blend in, he finishes grade school, but of course, not without apologizing to the boy for his mother’s sake. He enters high school feigning that he cares, that he’s normal but on each day he pretends, it’s like he’s losing himself more. 

He doesn’t want to say sorry when he passes his work late, he doesn’t want to pretend he’s sad when his classmate’s dad died, he doesn’t want to take responsibility for the actions he had taken, he doesn’t want to feel like he’s a different person. 

“Ma,” he asked his mom one time, “Why am I different?” his mom just looked at him and it frustrates him, “Ma!” 

“Tawan,” his mother choked, “sweetie, you’re not.” his mother said, consoling him but tears were falling from her eyes, sobs rocking her body and he remembers all of this because he screams. 

He screams, ripping his vocal chords, tugging his hair, and he’s just so frustrated. Why is he like this? Why is he not normal? He screams until his knees give out and all his mother could do was hug him. She could only tell him it’s going to be okay and that she still loves him nonetheless. 

Tawan could only hold on to her, as he cried out his frustrations. Despite all the negative emotions he’s feeling, he feels light on his mother’s hold. He almost feels like he’s a normal child as his mom strokes his back, and kisses his head. 

For a while, his thoughts died down. It was just him and his mom, and no one can hurt him. He’s normal.

He finally  _ broke _ when his mom was killed with a stray bullet. 

People said that she was in the wrong place and at the wrong time, that it was unfortunate, that it was a tragedy that it happened to her. Comments like  _ ‘she was a good person, why did it happen to her?’, ‘she had a son, poor him.’  _ was spread around the neighborhood and Tawan is just so goddamn tired of all of them. He wants to shut them all up with the  _ same bullet _ that killed his mom. 

That thought alone sent him on a spiral again. Without his mom, he’s lost how to handle his emotions. He can’t seem to find the most rational part of his thoughts, it just keeps on going and going about how wonderful it would be to  _ avenge _ his mom. 

About how it would be wonderful to have the same bullet pierce through them instead. 

  
  


_ News reports claim that a 30 year old was stabbed to death; body was found in an alleyway. _

_ Missing child report, a young male around 1.77m height. Last seen from home, said he’s going out to buy something from the local convenience store.  _

\----

Off was a risk-taker, that’s what would his friends say. 

He loved the phrase “What’s the fun in doing what you’re told?” and would smile oh-so mischievously, then the next you’d see him stealing things. He heartily laughs whenever he would walk away from his other victim, the object sitting comfortably on his pockets or wherever he can hide it.

It was all fun and games until he stole something valuable once.

“Off, it’s not funny,” his classmate in college said, her squeaky voice still ringing in his mind, “Give me back the pendant, my dad gave me that.” She stared at him menacingly, obviously mad now.

Off, on the other hand, was laughing even more. “I don’t even have it,” he said, giggling, “Seriously, calm down, ask our other classmates.”

She sighed, “It’s not funny, anymore. Just give it back.” She opened up her palm, “Off. Now.”

He doesn’t move, but instead stares at her, raising his brows. “What if I don’t?” He chuckles, and if you’d ask his classmates then, they’d say his chuckle was dark, like he was planning something evil.

“Off, just give it back,” said his other classmate, bumping shoulders with him, “It must be valuable.”

She nodded, then looked back at Off, still holding out her palm. Obviously waiting for the pendant, and not having the time to joke around with him. Off rolled his eyes, then brought out the pendant, laying it on his palm.

“Thank you,” She said, then moving to take the pendant but Off was faster; he closed his fist around the pendant before she could reach it from his palm. He smirks at her, treating it as a joke, until they both heard a crack.

“Off!” she screamed, then forcefully opened his fist to get the pendant. Just as expected, it was broken and cracked that it lost its shape, “Screw you, Off!” She said at him then ran away, her sobs echoing as she left the room.

“What is her problem?” Off replied, raising both his arms in annoyance, then looked at everyone in the room, “What?”

“Dude,” someone said, “Her dad left them, that’s the only memory she had.” The class erupted in gasps, murmurs, judgmental gazes and pity.

Off felt like he should be doing something, probably apologize, but it confused him when he only felt satisfaction. He felt like he took a big risk by breaking that pendant. 

It didn’t stop him from stealing things, though. In fact, he even felt like he needs to steal things that are way more valuable than a simple eraser or a pen, something like his professor’s glasses. For what? No reason at all, he just wants to feel the rush again when he broke that pendant. 

And the worse thing is? He doesn’t feel any remorse. 

“Off, I just got a call from your school that you’ve been stealing things.” His dad said to him when he got home, “Is that true?” He stood in front of him, all tall and mighty that Off cowered away. “Off.”

Off looked sideways then nodded, just to please his dad. 

“God, Off, what were you thinking?” His dad groaned, “What are you thinking?” He said to him, voice full of rage, shaking everything in the room.

He stayed silent though, letting his dad vent out his frustrations at him. He could’ve given a few inputs but frankly, he doesn’t care. He doesn’t care even--

“I’m a fucking big name in the business industry, Off.” His dad screamed, “You’re holding my surname and you do this shit!” He grabbed him by his shoulders and shook him, “Don’t bring the name Adulkittiporn to shame, God, Off! We talked about this!” 

Off rolled his eyes and shrugged his dad’s hands on his shoulders, “Yeah? Then treat me like one!” he screamed back, “I have been trying to get your attention, you know?” His voice trembled, his anger finally being let out after keeping it for so long, “I know I may not share your whole blood type or whatever, but I’m my mother’s son! Your wife!” 

“This is not about--”

“You think I don’t notice how you treat Mild? Yeah, I do. We’re step-siblings who live under the same roof, of course I would see it! You treat me differently because I didn’t come from you. Do I have to broaden it more?” 

His father groaned again, obviously more frustrated, “Off, come on, don’t pull this shit.” 

Off rolled his eyes again, then pushed him as he went to his room.

“Fuck you, Off!” his dad screamed again, then he heard a vase breaking.

Off chuckled behind his back as he flips over the shiny ATM card on his hands, “No, fuck you,  _ dad. _ ”

  
  


_ Mr. Adulkittiporn, owner of JD corporation, requests help from the people to find his missing son. _

_ “If anyone has seen my son, Off Adulkittiporn, please contact me as soon as possible. I know he’s a troublemaker, and he may have done worse things but he’s still my son. I will compensate to anyone who can give leads to where he could be”  _

\---

How their roads lead to one another is kind of funny and a work of fate truly. Off was going to this department store to find more clothes to hide in, damn his dad for plastering his face all over the city, when he found a boy also looking for clothes on the same row he’s in. His shirt looked like it went through hell as it had a lot of dark marks that would definitely stain.

Out of curiosity, Off approached him, landing a hand on his shoulder, “Hey, are you okay?” 

The other boy jumped at seeing him, “Hey, yeah.” He shrugged the hand out of his shoulder, “Please don’t touch me.” He gives him a smile, a timid one, but still a smile.

Off raises his brow as the boy leaves, “Hey!” he says and holds the boy by his arm, to which he reacts by a huff, “Let me buy you clothes, you look like you need one. Not with those dirty stains on you.” 

The boy looked down on his shirt and he didn’t even have time to react when Off pulled him to the shirt section. He doesn’t know what made him do that, but Off trusts his instincts.

And his instincts said he’d get something fun out of this.

\---

“No way!” Off said as they sat on an abandoned building, looking over the night sky, “You killed someone?” He turned to Tawan, he got his name after he bought him shirts, and let out a whistle, “So that’s what stains your shirt before. What made you?”

Tawan shrugged, “I hated them.” He sighed then looked down, “They kept gossiping about my mother.” His voice was so soft and small that if Off wasn’t close to him, he wouldn’t even hear him.

Off moved closer, “What happened to your mother?” He looked at Tawan and he can see the small hints of sadness on his face, “Is that an okay question?”

The other boy nodded, “Stray bullet. Dead on the spot.” The way he spoke as if it didn’t matter, like it didn’t mean anything. If it was anybody else, they would’ve thought the same but this is Off, who Tawan has been hanging out with for the past couple of months as they’re on the run. Hell, it’s been months but this is the first time they’ve spoken about their past lives.

“Shit.” was the only thing Off could offer, his lack of empathy still in him, “Uh, sorry?” Well, at least he tried.

Tawan laughed a bit, “Doesn’t mean shit to me,” He looked back up again, “but thanks. My mom was the best.” 

Off snorted next to him, “Well, my dad is the shittiest.” This time it was Tawan who turned to him, taking interest. Off noticed this and laughed, “Are you familiar with the JD corporations?” Tawan nodded again, “My father owns that.”

Tawan gasped, “No way!” He let out an amused laugh, “No shit, I’ve been on the run with an Adulkittiporn!” He laughed again, “That’s why you bought me clothes! You were a rich motherfucker!” 

Off waved him with his hand, “That was before, I’m a runaway now.” He sighed deeply, “If I go back, I’d be named as the worse Adulkittiporn. The one who put the family in shame. You see what they call me in the newspaper nowadays? ‘Off ‘Troublemaker’ Adulkittiporn.”

“Jumpol.” 

Off glanced at him, “What?”

“They forgot the Jumpol in your name,” Tawan smiled at him and Off wishes he can see more of that from him, “I’ll call you Jumpol instead, so you’re a new person. Everyone knows you by Off Adulkittiporn, I know you as Jumpol, the boy with daddy issues who liked to steal things.” 

Off shrugged his shoulders, “That’s nice.” Suddenly he snapped his fingers, “I’m calling you Tay, instead! So you’re not Tawan, the missing child who’s suspected for the killing of some girl back home, but you’re Tay…” He stopped for a while, thinking what he could describe him, “Tay, the boy who doesn’t feel anything towards other people but loves his mom.”

“I don’t-”

“My Tay.” 

Both of them stopped at that, Off doesn’t know what brought it out and Tawan doesn’t know what to say or what to react. Although, something changed in that moment, like a shift in the universe. Where Tawan can feel things aside from anger and where Off doesn’t have to bend himself to get someone’s attention.

“My Jumpol.”

\---

“You’re such an idiot, Tay!” Jumpol said as he tended to Tay’s wounds, bullet wounds.

One moment they were enjoying their drinks in a bar when suddenly police came in looking for Tawan, next thing they knew bullets were fired and Tay was hit. It was their luck that they had rented a motel room that night or else Jumpol would’ve been tending Tay’s wound somewhere else. Somewhere they can be easily caught.

“I didn’t-” Tay hissed, hitting Jumpol in the arm, “Careful!”

“I am being careful!” Jumpol hissed back, “You stay still!” He gripped Tay’s shoulder more forcefully. He is applying more ointment when Tay hisses again. “Shh, hold still, I’m almost done.”

Tay bit his lip to stop himself, if Jumpol says it’s almost done, then it’s _almost_ done. _He trusts him._

“Done!” 

Tay turned to his arm, smiling to himself, “Damn, thanks! I wouldn’t know without you.” He kissed his cheek in appreciation, and then laid down on the bed, exhaling, “Tonight was exhausting.”

The other boy slumps down next to him, “You said it,” he nodded, “Don’t pull that stupid shit again.” Jumpol warned him, eyeing him sideways. He was really worried, the doofus almost got himself killed. Tay would have started shooting everyone on that bar if he didn't pulled him out of there. It was on his eyes, the sparkle of being able to hurt somebody again. And as much as Jumpol wanted that, he didn't want to attract more police on their location, it would be a hell lot to get out of there.

Tay hummed, nodding along with him, then silence engulfed them, settling over them like a comfort blanket as it is what they needed after a whole night of gunshots and screams. Unfortunately he has to cut it short, he had something he wanted to talk about with Jumpol for a long time.

“Jumpol?” Tay called him, making the other boy turn his head, waiting for him, “You do realize what we’re doing, right?” Jumpol hummed next to him, “You do realize that someday, they’re going to catch up to us, right? That one day, we’re going to be cornered, and it’s the end of the line.” 

Jumpol sat up and looked at him, “Where is this coming from?” He did this again with his face that Tay loves, the one where he looked so confused that Tay wants to keep him in his pocket.

“It’s just,” Tay paused, then stared him straight in the eye, “Are you willing to do that whole run with me?” 

Right there, with the smallest and simplest choice of words, he has already lain out his whole heart and his insecurities. He told Jumpol, in that small motel room with the lights from the night sky shining on them, that he wants him. He may not say it in it’s full context, but it’s there and he hopes Jumpol feels it. He hopes he would feel how sincere he is and that, and he can’t stress this enough, he stays with him until the finish line. 

They were two broken souls who found each other and somehow, being with one another is enough for both souls to heal.

With no hesitation, Jumpol answers, “I would.” He smiles at him and everything is alright again. There’s no more heaviness in Tay’s heart, no more doubts and what if’s. Just Jumpol and his ‘I would’. 

“Tay?” He hummed, “I, uh” Jumpol stammered, “If the time comes, would you put me out of my misery?”

It’s short, but the promise is in there. In their world right now, they both know saying what they want to really want to imply is too much of a risk that even the infamous risk taker couldn’t do it. Maybe it’s because they don’t know what tomorrow could bring, or the other day, but if it’s said like this, it’s more of a promise that we’re on this together until their last breath.

“I would.” 

\---

“Hand’s up! It’s the police, you’re cornered.” 

Both Jumpol and Tay raise their hands, blinking from all the lights that are directed at them. Jumpol takes a look at Tay and sees that he holds the emotionless look on his face again. It’s been a while since he saw Tay like that, and it kind of puts a heavy feeling on his heart. _Is this the finish line they both promised?_

“Off?” 

All the lights shifted from them to the voice, and to everybody’s shock, it’s Mr. Adulkittiporn. Jumpol grits his teeth on seeing him, he hates--no, _despises_ him.

“Off, come home,” his father says, offering his hand, “Stop this madness and let’s go home.” he begs his son again, but Jumpol only looks away. Disgusted at him, _what a fake act in front of the masses._

Tay laughs next to him, “Last time I checked, the newspapers were calling him Off ‘Troublemaker’ Adulkittiporn, and what did you do?” He says, a look of challenge on his eyes, “You did nothing to clear your son’s name.” 

“You know nothing!” 

“I know more than you do.”

Jumpol puts a hand on Tay’s back to stop him, which causes the police to raise their guns at them again. He just snorts at them, not caring at this point. He just needs to stop Tay before he does anything. 

“Off,” his dad tries again, “Let’s go home.” The hardness in his voice can be heard and it’s all Tay needed to get his _negative_ emotions the best of him.

He gets the gun from his back pocket, and where did this come from again? Oh, when Jumpol managed to charm a police officer once and to his tactics, he managed to steal his gun without anyone noticing, Tay laughs with a hint of sadness. It’s one of the memories he’d get to keep on his dying breath, even if that last breath is today.

He aims it at Jumpol’s father, and he might be grateful for once in his life that he can’t feel guilt because right now, he would love to see the splatter of Mr. Adulkittiporn’s blood on everyone’s shirt. Stain them like it stained his shirt when he had his first victim.

“Shut the fuck up,” Tay says, voice low, “Don’t make me say it again, Mr. Adulkittiporn.” 

"Off." Mr. Adulkittiporn tries again, staring them both down. 

Jumpol’s takes a look at how everyone is handling this, and as if the world went in slow motion, he sees the exact time a police officer commanded another to take a shot. 

It happened way too fast, first there was a _sound_ , then before Jumpol could react, Tay groans next to him then falls to his knees. The red blossoming on his chest, the same chest where Jumpol would lay his head to hear his heartbeat, grounding him that Tay is alive, that Tay is with him, and he screams his name.

He kneels along with him, catching his fall, and applying pressure to his chest as Tay gasps for breath. “Tay, Tay, c’mon, this isn’t funny.” He cries, his hand slowly being coated with blood, “Tay, c’mon!” He screams and shakes him, but nothing changes, so he turns to everyone, “Help me, please! He’s losing blood, He’s--Tay, c’mon!” 

No one moves, their guns still on them. It frustrates him to no end but he can deal with them later, Tay is dying in his hands.

“Tay,” He sobs his name, “Tay, fight for me, please.”

“J-Jump..” Tay chokes out a bit of blood and Jumpol cries harder, this shouldn’t be happening. This isn’t supposed to be happening.

They were just supposed to celebrate their another year of being runaways, they were supposed to end this day with Jumpol falling asleep to Tay’s heartbeats. They were supposed to celebrate this day on the abandoned building looking at the stars, where they first called each other their new names. They were supposed to end this day, promising each other of another year to run away.

“Jumpol,” He says again, smiling weakly, even with the blood on his mouth and on his chest, Jumpol still thinks he’s still beautiful, “Jumps..”

“I’m here,” He reassures him, “I’m here, Tay.”

With his slow breaths, every second is a pain to him, Tay manages out an “I love you.” His voice cracked and it hurt, but Jumpol heard him loud and clear.

“Tay, no!” He screams again, “That’s not what we say, that’s not,” he chokes on his tears and motherfucker Tay even laughs at him, “I hate you, god, that’s not what we say. We say, you would put me out in misery, not this, Tay.” 

“It would come to this anyway,” he responds, “We both know it from the start,” 

Jumpol shakes his head then screams at everyone again to get help, he’s ruining his vocal chords for him and in his last moments, for the first time he feels something, Tay is grateful he found this man. The man who made him feel that there’s more to avenge and anger, that there could be laughs underneath the sheets, that there could be something funny whenever Jumpol tells a story. That even though he lacks certain emotions to be a normal human being, that even though he finds joy in hurting other people, Jumpol made him feel like he’s deserving of at least one good thing in his life. 

On his dying breath, he lets out, “I love you, Jumpol.” 

_Everything is chaos the next minute._ Jumpol breaks and takes the gun from Tay’s hands, then he starts shooting. He can’t even hear the gunshots anymore, everything is silent, as if the world turned silent, but he sees the guns aimed at him, the guns that are firing at him. He knows he’s going to get shot, it’s going to happen.

And when it did, he didn’t fight back. 

He lets the pain blossom in his body, and when he dropped on the ground, the last thing he sees is Tay’s body next to him and his dad dropping his gun, and since when did he have a gun? 

“Tay,” he chokes out, “Until the finish line,” then everything turns dark.

  
  


_ “In his last moments, I saw my son reaching for this boy’s hand. He kept fighting until he finally got to finally hold it, and just like that, I realized my son found more love and comfort in a boy than he ever did with me. He was the last person my son reached out to before he let his eyes close.” Mr. Adulkittiporn says in an interview about his runaway son and the missing child; Tay Tawan Vihokratana and Off Jumpol Adulkittiporn both ran away from home last 2018 and are reported to have committed different murder since then, the police finally caught up to them last week, ending the 3 year chase.  _

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first time writing a whole ass fic and sharing it with everyone so i'm sorry if there's any grammatical mistakes or if it's too fast paced or stuff. hehe


End file.
